Monday Poetry Train–My Daughter’s Poem

It’s been a little while since I jumped onto the poetry train, but I wanted to share something. 

I didn’t write this.  My sixteen year-old daughter did for a class and she gave me permission to share.    She was told to write a poem using a picture from a famous photographer and she used this one from Gianluca Nespoli.  (If you have time, visit his website. It’s a wonderful place filled with incredible images!)

She got me–moved me to tears with this one. 🙂


The Mime


Death pretending

Pale locked face

Footsteps clicking in the corner

Of my word explosive mind.

What was I thinking when I laid here

What was I thinking when I committed

Myself to a life of silence.

Never breathing a word

Swallowing sentences

Letter for letter.

The perfect Life

I never have to explain myself.


Regret a thousand miles long.

You wanted the words I could never speak.

I tried so hard to show you

But that’s not what you wanted.

You wanted me to break it all for you.

To snap what I’ve had going for so long.

To see my white face wiped off.

For the gloves to be gone.

You wanted to be the only thing.


And I tried.

But I failed

Because when I tried

to choke the words back up..

I couldn’t.

I’ve forgotten how to use my mouth.

For conversation to spill out of it.

It’s been far too long since I could.


And you left.

I laid here and waited to die,

Come back to me my love.

I’ll remember somehow.

I’ll risk it all for you.

I took the gloves off.

Come wipe the white off my face.

I’ll speak the world for you.



Take a ride on Rhian’s Poetry Train!


About Rinda Elliott

Writer.I love unusual stories and credit growing up in a family of curious life-lovers who moved all over the country. Books and movies full of fantasy, science fiction and romance kept us amused, especially in some of the stranger places. For years, I tried to separate my darker side with my humorous and romantic one. I published short fiction, but things really started happening when I gave in and mixed it up. When not lost in fiction, I love making wine, collecting music, gaming and spending time with my husband and two children. I’m represented by Miriam Kriss of the Irene Goodman Agency.
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12 Responses to Monday Poetry Train–My Daughter’s Poem

  1. Artistic, emotive, and provocative. Nicely done. 🙂

  2. julia says:

    This really IS fantastic. Thanks to your daughter for sharing it with us, and to you for posting it. I remember having those exact same thoughts when I broke up with my second boyfriend. It took about a year for it to sink in that he’d actually given me the gift of growth. But it’s not something that can be learned any other way.

    ‘Come back to me my love.
    I’ll remember somehow.
    I’ll risk it all for you.
    I took the gloves off.
    Come wipe the white off my face.
    I’ll speak the world for you.’

    It’s then that you’re ready for the next chapter in your life, not a rehash of what you’ve already outgrown. Really, really wonderful poem.

  3. Ann says:

    Beautiful poem. Thank you, and your daughter, for sharing it with us.

  4. It is indeed a very moving poem. Infact it works at many levels, for a lover, for fellow countrymen, For apathy.

  5. Your daughter is very talented! 🙂 This is a very emotional and beautiful poem. The images are great.

  6. Jill says:

    When some of you post something like that I would want to actually teach french or english!!
    Still hope for our future writers!! Thank and congratulate your daughter for me!

  7. Lisa Andel says:

    Your daughter did a wonderful job. Thank her for sharing this with us.

  8. Beautiful and moving. Tell her she touched my heart.

  9. Ken says:

    Very moving poem. Thanks for sharing!

  10. Julia H says:

    This poem is written by a beautiful person. She is not only gorgeous outside she is even more beautiful inside. She sees beauty everywhere. I love her.

  11. Damian W says:

    I cannot tell you how much you and your daughter have touched my soul, I am trying to write a letter to my daughter because i met her for the first time in 20 years last week i was a bit of a loss as a dad now she lives in the usa with her mum and stepdad, she wanted to know why i never wrote and i told her the truth DRUGS now that ive met her i want to be a better dad to her, she asked would i write now, so i want to write to her and your poem has made me feel that now i can. I cant thank you enough its good to know that good people are still out there, THANK YOU

  12. relliott4 says:

    Wow. I’m so glad you enjoyed my daughter’s poem. I hppe you and your daughter enjoy a fantastic writing relationship. My daughter and I do even though we live in the same house. In fact, she writes me letters quite a bit. Leaves them all over the place. Sounds like you two are on the right track. 🙂

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