Desperately Need to Change Channel

So.  My husband has been watching this show lately.  I don’t know if it’s new or not–it’s new to us.  Desperate Landscapes.  I can’t handle the hours of HGTV, DIYand Food Network he likes (Can we please, please, please have a new Star Trek series?  A good one?  Or better yet, start the Charlain Harris show earlier???) so I usually settle into my big chair with my laptop and earphones.  It’s surprisingly easy to slip into my fictional world while he’s dreaming of all the renovations he’d like to do to our house.  He even has a list.  Makes me break out into a cold sweat just looking at it. 

But, lately, he’s turned to DIY more.  Says they actually do stuff and aren’t as showy as HGTV–none of that next design star crap.  (Yeah, alt-world here since I have no freaking idea what he’s talking about.) 

But uh, there’s a problem with this new show. 

My eyes are drawn to the screen often.  Still have the earphones, so it’s not the exciting music or promise of a pretty landscaped yard.  No, it’s something way more basic.  Have you seen this guy’s arms?????  

He’s always digging out big trees or using saws.  How is a woman supposed to concentrate with all that going on? 

You know, the hubby used to bring me to work with him.  He was a trim carpenter then.  I’d have a book (was never without one) but peek over the top to watch the muscles in his arms as he worked…

Uh oh, he’s grinning at me.  Probably just figured out why I’m smiling and staring at the screen over here.


About Rinda Elliott

Writer.I love unusual stories and credit growing up in a family of curious life-lovers who moved all over the country. Books and movies full of fantasy, science fiction and romance kept us amused, especially in some of the stranger places. For years, I tried to separate my darker side with my humorous and romantic one. I published short fiction, but things really started happening when I gave in and mixed it up. When not lost in fiction, I love making wine, collecting music, gaming and spending time with my husband and two children. I’m represented by Miriam Kriss of the Irene Goodman Agency.
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6 Responses to Desperately Need to Change Channel

  1. I see what you mean. Very nice, indeed. And that’s the real reason for HGTV, to learn about beauty. Seems like you’ve passed the course. lol. 😉

  2. Nice arms!

    I know what you mean, but at least home renovation is a better hobby than those of the extra-marital variety. 😉

    I like Clean House. That’s my fantasy. Someone else clean my house. Please.

    Will write for Maid Service.

  3. relliott4 says:

    Yeah, but home renovation is messy and time consuming. I just wanna write.

    But.. he’s about to turn one of our back porches into a bigger laundry room with some cabinets for my wine making storage and put in a new bathroom in the old laundry room.

    The results are always great. I shouldn’t complain.

    But, yeah, I just wanna write. 😉

  4. Kathy says:


    It’s funny you bring this up: Gary and I were watching (me, half-watching) this show, Ace Of Cakes, on the Food Network (my family’s current addiction), and the mousey-yet-opinionated receptionist was lusting for this geeky yet-fabulously-talented guy’s arms. Kinda scrawny guy, and she was commenting on his buff arms and how she liked to watch him do his thang.

    In my half-listening state, my head bobbed up at the mention of arms. I was like–she say what? Gary looked at me and smiled, knotted his fist, pumping up his bicep. “This is your idea of an arm.”

    I laughed. I was never good at hiding my thoughts on my face.

    I also like legs. Nice. Strong. Muscle-y legs.

  5. Rinda says:

    Muscle-y appendages good.

    Tell Gary I think he’s very sexy. 😉

  6. Kathy says:

    I will not!

    There would be no living with him for days. LOL

    Thanks, anyway, but we’ll keep it our secret.

    I know. I’m mean. But he likes that.

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