There is nothing like waking in the middle of the night, looking up into a dark room and realizing the last three chapters of a book due in four days are wrong. Completely wrong. So… as you can probably guess, I didn’t sleep much. I also had my laptop open soon after seven a.m. this morning, trying to figure out what to do.
Strangely, I’m not panicking at this point. It’s ten a.m. and I’m still in my pjs and have already written about a thousand words that didn’t work either. I’ll have to throw them out. My house is not even close to being in the shape I like, but I’ve been buried, so I’m learning to accept that occasionally, the carpet doesn’t have to be vacuumed. The Oklahoma spring has been full of hail and frost and the veggie garden we put in too early has managed to survive, but my lack of weeding might change that soon…
It’s a weird peaceful mood despite the chaos of deadline and messy home. It’s Mother’s Day and my husband is making me breakfast and taking care of the laundry so I can continue with the book. The smell of sizzling bacon and hot coffee has me closing my eyes and inhaling deeply often. I called my mother this morning and she sounded cheerful as she was leaving for breakfast with my father and their friends. It made me smile to know my mother is enjoying the day despite the rain-check I had to give her because of the deadline. My daughter and I sent each other funny text messages last night and even though she told her father on me for using him and janky in the same sentence, I still think she’s the best daughter a mother could want. My son spent a long day working behind the stage on shows at his school yesterday and called me for emergency food for him and a friend. I liked knowing that he understood he could rely on me. And then, when he got home late last night, his poor hands red from rope burn, he was sweetly excited about the nice paycheck he’d earned and about being called back for more shows. He smiled at me like I’m the best Mom in the world.
So no, my book timeline isn’t where it should be and my vegetable garden is full of weeds I’ll have to tackle eventually and I’m pretty sure the laundry pile is spilling into the next room…but you know what? I’m a lucky woman.